It's weird how I go from one opposite to another. I don't feel better now. I've started just last night to hoard my pills till I have enough to overdose on. I don't want to fucking eat anymore. I've had it with my fat self. I am NOT going to gain any more weight. I'm going to try to lose weight again, whether I have to starve myself or purge, I don't care. I'll do both. What's the point if I'm just going to kill myself in the end anyway?
What do I have to live for? Nothing. I'm so tired of this pointless life. I'm ready to go.
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